Let's Stop the Blame Game


Let’s stop playing the “blame game.”

With our addictive minds, we try to avoid taking responsibility for our actions. Here are some of the statements I have heard guys make after they relapsed:
  • “My roommate is supposed to enable the password on his laptop when he leaves the apartment. Well yesterday he didn’t and I relapsed. It’s my roommate’s fault.”
  • “The filter on my computer stopped working and I relapsed. It’s the filter’s fault.”
  • “The pattern my Bishop used to lock down my cell phone was too easy to crack and I relapsed. It was my Bishop’s fault.”
  • “When I signed up for high speed Internet, they gave me a free tablet. It didn’t have a filter so I relapsed. It was Internet provider's fault”
  • “My phone is supposed to be locked down. But I discovered that this particular app was able to give me access to google and I relapsed. So it was the app’s fault.”
In each of these situations, the person making the statement had very weak boundaries or no boundaries at all. Each one of them was depending on some-one or some-thing to protect them from the Internet. Thus, they felt little hesitation in trying to get passed whatever barrier had been put in their path.  

It's like: “If I can find a way around this road block then it's my duty to try and I'm not responsible."

But what would happen if I put a pack of cigarettes on the night stand next to their bed. What would be their response?  I’ll bet – without hesitation, most would reject it.  And they wouldn’t have to think twice about it. Why is that?  

Perhaps it’s because they, a long time ago, made a decision not to smoke. It was a single decision and they only had to make it one time. They don't have to make that decision every time they are given the opportunity.

But what about pornography and related activities?  What happens when those opportunities to act out present themselves?  Do we immediately reject those thoughts – or do we have to think about them first? If we have to make a decision each time, we will have a 50% chance of making a bad decision.

Wouldn’t it be much better to make that decision just once and get it over with  -- just like we did with smoking. So why don’t we just do that right now???

If we are willing to make a firm decision to avoid pornography, just once, and get it over with, we won’t be tempted to keep testing the boundaries and blaming others for our sins.

Think about it!


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