Let's Stop Kidding Ourselves

The Alcoholic

What would you think if you heard an alcoholic make the following statements?
  • I used to get drunk by drinking vodka, but it’s not so bad now because I’m only getting drunk on beer.
      
  • I think I’m doing much better.  It used to take me days to get over a hangover and I felt so guilty.  But now I can get over a hangover quickly and not feel so bad.
After reading the above statements, what are your thoughts? 

Might some of your thoughts contain the following ideas?

An alcoholic is really addicted to alcohol in all its forms.  It doesn’t matter whether he drinks hard liquor or just beer or wine.  It’s all alcohol -- and a drunk is still a drunk.  One kind of drunk is not better than another.  His goal should be complete abstinence from all alcohol and never getting drunk again!

Shifting Gears

Now let’s shift gears to some statements I've actually heard from those of us who suffer from our own particular addiction.
  • I used to relapse by viewing pornography, but it’s not so bad now because I’m only relapsing by masturbating and not viewing.  
  • I think I’m doing much better.  It used to take me days to get over a relapse and I felt so guilty.  But now I can get over a relapse much quicker and not feel so much shame.

If we are tempted to use the above logic, are we being honest with ourselves?  

In reality, our addiction is not just to pornography.  Our addiction is really to lust, and the chemicals lust produces in our brain.

It doesn’t matter whether we view pornography, or masturbate, or participate in other sexual activities outside of marriage, the result in our brain is the same.  And a relapse is a relapse is a relapse, no matter the cause.  One relapse is not better than another.

Our Goal

Our goal should be complete sobriety and complete recovery, not just making relapses less painful or substituting masturbation for viewing – it’s all the same. 

Remember: Our ultimate goal is to overcome this addiction completely and never relapse again. 

And if that really is our goal, then sometime has to be the last time!  

So why not decide -- right now -- to make the last time you relapsed, really the last time?




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